Day 1 : Open your social media, look at people doing so well! Feel happy for your friends.
Day 10 : Open your social media, look at people doing so well. Have second thoughts about your choices.
Day 11 : Not opening social media, symptoms of second thoughts still on!
There are days I wonder as to why I get pushed down so low. Then I try and wake up from the slumber of self pity only to find such a weight on my chest throughout the day. I’m faking it. I don’t want to be happy but I’m smiling, making sure no one knows I’m stressed.
Don’t even begin to think there is a social message in this post because there is none.
What has lead me to believe that being low is a bad thing? What has given me the pressure of being the cheerleader? I spend years on making friendships that break in seconds over another person’s incredulous lack of sincerely. Sometimes I have all the ideas in the world but sometimes I just lie on my bed waiting for something to pick me up. And in the midst of all that I always find the silver lining in the fact that this is a new day. New beginnings and all that right? But that becomes a reason for negative soon enough when I head out for the routine!
So, what? What is the answer? The answer is suck it up and live real! Live like you are the one that matters most. Live like you can make a difference. Live like you’re the Messiah but do give yourself time to feel low. Time to grieve that bitter hate bite some annoyed relative, friend or acquaintance left on your heart. It is only fair that I understand my own self and give me the unconditional love that I deserve because Hey! If I don’t, who will?